And In Conclusion...

So, next time (next year? let's hope not), I would focus on the turkey, and not worry about things like the green bean casserole, or marshmallows on the candied yams until the turkey was totally, definitely, for sure and for reals out of the oven. I would also figure out how to do something like carving a turkey. I would make more gravy by any means possible. I would buy a second or third box of wild rice, and accept that when they say 2 servings per box, they mean it. I would totally spatchcock that turkey again, but give it more time than Mark Bittman claims. Astute readers will also notice that although peas were on the initial menu, I decided to forgo them. It probably didn't matter either way, but if I had had a little more time at the end, I think something else green would have been welcome.

All of the above is worth all of the below, especially if you can get someone else to wash the dishes.